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How to Politely Escape Conversations About Other People’s Kids
Networking events can be a lot like speed dating, except instead of asking, “What’s your favorite movie?” you’re fielding questions about business goals, market trends, and - inevitably - someone’s toddler who just learned to finger-paint.
Don’t get us wrong, kids are great! But if you’re trying to build meaningful business connections, spending 20 minutes nodding along to a slideshow of someone's baby’s first steps can feel... less than productive.
So, how do you politely steer conversations back to business (or escape entirely) without offending anyone? Let’s dive into some rare and hilariously practical tips.
1. The Classic Redirect: From Toddler Tales to Trade Trends
When someone starts a detailed monologue about their little one’s recent dance recital, channel your inner magician and pull off a conversational pivot.
What to say:
“Wow, that’s adorable! It sounds like she’s got a lot of energy. Kind of like launching a new product line, right? Have you ever done a big launch?”
Why it works: You’re validating their story and bringing the focus back to business. Sneaky, but effective.
2. Leverage Your “Oh, That Reminds Me” Card
People love to talk, but they love to listen when they think you’re about to share something fascinating.
How to use it: Wait for a pause in their story, then jump in with:
“Oh, that reminds me, I heard about a new app that’s perfect for busy parents who run their own businesses. Have you heard of it?”
It’s a polite way to show you were listening while subtly guiding the conversation to a topic you prefer.
3. Enlist the Fake Emergency Text
If the kid-talk has hit its third encore and you’re fresh out of polite smiles, here’s your escape plan: the classic "emergency text" move.
How to pull it off:
Keep your phone on vibrate.
Set up a text shortcut with a friend or colleague that says, “Send help! Networking event overload!”
When the text arrives, you can say, “Oh, I just got a message from my assistant. Excuse me for a moment!”
4. Use Props as Distractions
Carry something that invites curiosity, like a funky notebook, an unusual coffee tumbler, or a business-related gadget.
What to do: When you feel trapped, casually gesture to your prop:
“Speaking of your kid’s Lego skills, look at this tech organizer I use for conferences. It’s like adult Legos for entrepreneurs!”
Props are great conversation starters and transition tools.
5. Embrace the Honest Humor Exit
Sometimes, honesty is the best (and funniest) policy. If the kid stories are overwhelming, inject a bit of humor:
“Your kids sound amazing! I feel like I could write a business plan just based on their adventures. But I’d love to hear more about what you do!”
It’s lighthearted, kind, and refocuses the discussion without being dismissive.
6. Be the Host of Your Own Mini-Huddle
When all else fails, become the center of attention on your terms. Introduce others into the conversation and shift the topic.
What to say:
“This is so fun! By the way, have you two met? [Person A], meet [Person B]. You both have fascinating stories about [insert shared interest].”
Once the conversation gets rolling, you can gracefully step out.
7. Prepare a Killer Networking One-Liner
Keep a go-to phrase handy for transitioning out of any topic gracefully.
Examples:
“Wow, that’s so interesting! I wish I could hear more, but I want to make sure I meet a few more people tonight before it gets late.”
“This has been great, but I see someone I’ve been meaning to connect with. Let’s exchange cards, and I’ll follow up!”
These one-liners get you out of the chat without burning bridges.
Final Escape Hatch: Leave a Lasting Impression
When you exit, make sure you leave the conversation on a high note. Compliment their story, thank them for sharing, and remind them to connect later. You’ll look like a networking pro, even if you’re internally screaming.
Not a Fan of Networking Events? We Get It.
If awkward small talk and endless kid stories make you want to hide in the snack corner, we have a better solution.
Sign up for our Small Biz Network Without the Awkwardness Club. (lol)
We promise:
No long-winded kid stories.
No forced “fun” icebreakers.
And maybe - just maybe - a few adorable puppy pics. 🐾
Let’s build real connections, minus the stress. Sign-up today and make networking your kind of fun!
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